Manly or not

I’ve received several requests for advice that require only short answers, so I’ve combined them into one post.

Most manly item of clothing?  Blue jeans.

Are mustaches manly?  Only when combined with a beard.

Most manly item of food?  Whole beef ribs.

Most manly political party?  Libertarian.

Most manly car?  1970 Pontiac Trans Am with the Ram Air V option.

Are neck ties manly?  Just look where they point.

Most manly shoe?  Steel toed work boots.

Most manly country?  Scotland.

Most manly hairstyle?  Hair what?

Is it manly to do house work?  Only in your own home.

Can homosexuals be manly?  Yes.

Most manly pickup truck?  The one with the most dents that still runs.

Most manly non-alcoholic beverage.  That’s a tie between coffee and iced tea.

Is running manly?  That depends on what you’re chasing.

Is gardening manly?  Only if growing things to eat.

Most manly nut.  My left one.

Is it manly to eat quiche?  Only to win a bet.

Most manly sport?  Rugby.

Most manly occupation?  US Marine.

Belching, manly or not?  It’s only manly if you do it to extinguish a fire.

Is it manly to chew tobacco and spit?  No.  A man swallows.

Playing soccer, manly or not?  Any sport where there’s a chance you’ll get kicked in the balls is manly.

Mister Manly

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8 Responses to Manly or not

  1. betme says:

    “Hair what?” 😀

    Btw Mr. J eats quiche when I load it with sausage and bacon and tell him it is an omelet. As for the tobacco answer???? I had no idea that men swallow! (sorry, couldn’t help myself)

  2. mistermanly says:

    Hi b,

    I should have added the quiche eating thing only applies to public consumption.

    As to the tobacco swallowing answer, that is based on an event from my youth. During the time I spent in Canada, I was invited to go trout fishing in Calgary, where the invitees parents lived. It was an 800 mile drive, which Canadians seem to think of as an afternoon excursion. At the time, I was a pipe smoker, so I spent the first hour or five happily puffing away, before it finally occurred to me that the driver, who kept stuffing chewing tobacco into his mouth, wasn’t spitting. When I inquired about this, he responded, “it’s too much trouble to spit, so I swallow it.” While we had many adventures over that weekend, including my capture of a 20″ rainbow and being accosted by the Canadian Mounted Police, His casual answer still stands out in my mind as the major event of the journey.

    As to hairstyles, you might find it interesting to know that I usually get mine sheered in the spring, but this year I have decided to let it grow. Grasping at lost youth, I suppose. Unfortunately, this decision required making a deal with my wife that, shortly before our son’s wedding next year, I have to make use of the services of something called a “hair saloon.” I’m beginning to think that this doesn’t involve drinking, and that I may not have made the best possible bargain. Live and learn.

    Mister Manly

  3. Dave says:

    Put ketchup on your quiche…it elevates it into swallowing territory.

  4. mistermanly says:

    Hi Dave,

    Actually, the taste isn’t all that bad, it’s the thought that’s disgusting. Still, I can see that a manly dash of ketchup could only help. I’ll keep that in mind the next time someone wants to pay me to eat the stuff.

    Mister Manly

  5. 2lazydogs says:

    Ummm…iced tea a manly beverage? I think I have to quibble with you on this one.

    And why is eating quiche not manly? It’s just egg pie, for crying out loud. Sure, the name in itself is not very manly, but the ingredients are.

    “Most manly nut. My left one.” Don’t you think your right one might be a little jealous?

  6. mistermanly says:

    Hi 2,

    The iced tea is a Southern thing.

    Quiche is French, and thus not manly. It’s also fancy, which makes it even less manly.

    It is.

    Mister Manly

  7. MJ says:

    “Most manly sport? Rugby.” Amen to that. Football without pads.
    And you must be a Southern boy, picking iced tea as manly and all.

    What about manliest occupation(s)?

    BTW, thanks for stopping by my blog and for the link love over there on your blog roll.
    I will return the gesture.

  8. mistermanly says:

    Hi MJ,

    I’m most definitely Southern.

    Anyone who doubts that rugby is the most manly sport had better be ready to put their body on the line to play it.

    As to manly occupations, many are right up there, but my answer, US Marine, stays the same. Really, even the girls in that outfit have more balls than most men can dream of possessing. There are, however, a tremendous number of close second places in this area, to which I will soon devote a separate post.

    As to links, you started it which, I must say, only goes to prove what an astute person you are. With that in mind, how could I not mention to my readers that you are worthy of their attention? In other words, thanks 🙂

    Mister Manly

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